


Bedroom Hymns

by kittybenzedrine



Series: Timelines [52]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Booty Calls, Emotional Turmoil, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Implied F/F, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Inconsistent tense, Non-Explicit Sex, POV Third Person, Rough Sex, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Vaginal Sex, Widowed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:28:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21592303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittybenzedrine/pseuds/kittybenzedrine
Summary: Leo tells himself this is the last time.This is the last time he and Renee are going to get tangled up in the sheets. This is the last time they're going to do this. This is thelast time.But it never is._____All pieces of the Timelines series are standalones and can be read without context.
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Male Character
Series: Timelines [52]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/728796
Kudos: 7





	Bedroom Hymns

Leo tells himself this is the last time.

This is the last godsdamned time. This, this- whatever they're doing, it's been going on way too fucking long and it needs to stop. Whatever this is isn't healthy for him, it never has been. And the longer it keeps going, the more it's going to hurt her.

Her voice quivers, breaks, and Leo presses his face into the crook of her neck.

He's dragging things out. He has been for years. This, whatever they're doing, never should have started in the first place. This shouldn't be happening at all. This, this, this-

His mind whites out as he gives a few last desperate thrusts, digs his nails into Renee's shoulders as his orgasm finally hits.

Renee lets out a long breath, presses her face into his shoulder when he finally rolls off of her. Her hand is dry when it finds its place on his clammy belly. He's sweaty all over and she's dry where he hasn't touched her. The one on top always does the work and gets sweaty in the process. He likes being on top and taking control, but so does Renee. She looks a picture when she's on top, all thick thighs and tight muscles from her upbringing working on a farm. Her breasts in his face, her hands on either side of his head, tight around him as a third orgasm tears through her body-

She was barely legal when this thing started. Just two, maybe three weeks after her eighteenth birthday. Eighteen to his nearly twenty-five. His wife had passed a few months before and he was still numb, still in the fog of loss as he led this girl- not even a woman yet in his eyes, just a girl who was now legally classified as an adult- back to his bedroom, long after his small house party ended. Leo undressed her, touched her body eight feet away from where his wife committed suicide less than half a year previous. He fucked Renee in his marital bed, wedding ring still on his shaking left hand.

It was excused as a one-off thing. Very out of character for him, but he excused himself. Grief can make humans do things that they normally wouldn't, and fucking a mouthy, loud, barely legal friend-of-a-friend wasn't something he'd ever do.

Except, he saw her outside of the local bakery three weeks after that. It was drizzling out. Not a full on rain, but enough that her thick curls were beginning to be weighed down by the water and her clothes were mostly damp. There was a cigarette in her mouth and she was scowling. Looked like she hated everything in the fucking world. An agreeable sentiment.

She ended up in the passenger side of his car, wearing nothing but his jacket and her panties. Said she didn't want to get the interior of his nice sports car wet. Leo also didn't want her to get the leather interior of his nice sports car wet, so it was a win-win all around. He drove her home while she complained of walking into town not knowing that it was going to rain, mad that she left the doors and top off of her jeep and left it in the driveway. When he arrived at her house, she invited him in. She put her shorts back on and let him protect the two of them with an umbrella, wondering how an eighteen year old could afford her own home as he watched her unlock the door.

They fucked again, in her bed this time. She rode him like her fucking life depended on it, cried his name as she gripped the headboard with one hand and his shoulder with the other. She smelled like cigarette smoke and honey bodywash, and she rode him so hard after his orgasm hit that he blacked out for a few moments.

Renee fished his phone out of his pants while he threw away the condom and wiped himself off. She put her number in but left it at that. Didn't put his in her own phone, didn't instruct him to call her or anything. Simply told him she was interested in keeping things up if he was. He wasn't.

And yet a week later she was in his bed again. And again two days later. And again the next morning. And again. And again.

And again.

And here they are five years later. Still regularly fucking.

Her breathing has already begun to slow. It's late in the night and she's been tired for hours, he's already had her twice today. It was a challenge to cum this third time and he wore _himself_ out in the process of trying to get there. They try not to sleep over at each other's homes, but he's not going to be a dick and kick her out, make her drive half an hour home while she's exhausted.

Renee mumbles something to him. He doesn't catch most of it, but he pieces together that he isn't getting anymore out of her tonight. Too tired, too sore she says. That's fine with him. This time, it's the last time. Leo knows that he tells himself that every single time but he means it this time. He's going to make her breakfast tomorrow as an apology for beating her insides up so many times, and then he's going to quietly ghost her once she leaves. It's going to stop for good after this.

Things _did_ stop for a short while two years previous. Renee and her best friend started something, and Renee didn't have the time or energy to fuck two people at one time. She chose the gentle touch of a woman's fingers and lips over the same dick she'd been getting for three years. He was okay with it. It was fine for about a month in fact, before the lack of physical contact started driving him fucking crazy. It wasn't like her and Breezy were in a relationship. It wasn't exclusive. Renee was still free to do whatever she liked after she left Breezy's place. If she wanted to fuck someone in her car, in Breezy's driveway, she'd have her best friends's blessing to do so. But _Renee_ made it exclusive. 

She'd still allow casual touch, but anything else was shied away from. No more hands on her thighs, mouth on her throat, no more of her legs around his waist while he pinned her to the wall and fucked her so loud that her neighbors could hear-

After five weeks and three days of nothing from Renee, he broke. It was five weeks of jerking off so fucking often that he was developing callouses on his dick, five weeks of craving the tender caress of Renee's hands on his jaw, his chest, on his cock, that sweet cry of " _Leo!_ " in his ear. 

"You have to stop," he'd told Breezy. "You two can't,- She isn't,- _I need this_ , Breezy."

She didn't even pretend to be confused. Breezy Sarja understood. She could see it in his eyes just how desperate he was. Could hear it in his tone. There wasn't- he didn't want to chance things and try to find someone else to fuck. He knew Renee didn't have any STI's, knew what she liked, knew more than he comfortable knowing about a girl who, though long-term, was- _is-_ essentially a booty-call. So Breezy stopped fucking Renee, and within two weeks she was back in his bed, knees tight enough around his ribs to bruise.

From then on, he did his best to entice her to stay. While he wanted (and still wants) things to end, he- _he_ wanted to be the one to end things. He wanted it to be on his terms. If someone walked away first, it had to be _him_.

So he kept her hooked. He kept things heavy and intense. Finally indulged her kinks. He'd pull her hair hard enough that he'd find strands stuck between his fingers when he finally let go, spanked her hard enough to bruise. Choked her, tied her up, slapped her around and called her names that even made _him_ blush. He used and abused her just like she'd been quietly asking him to for three years. She stared coming around even more once he'd finally given her the gratification of fucking her exactly how she wanted.

The roughness isn't an all the time thing however. Though it turns her on, he doesn't enjoy hurting her. He takes it easy sometimes. It'll be rough, sure, but he's not pulling her hair out or gagging her on his dick. It's nice to see her practically drooling on herself after he fucks her senseless, but he dislikes seeing any marks other than hickies. He'll go at it hard enough to have the headboard slamming into the wall while being careful not to harm her.

It isn't entirely intense, either. He fucks her slow and tender too, quiet in the night, gentle like they're- like they're something he's not going to name.

Leo moves slow, delicately extracts himself from her and rolls onto his side to face her. Her eyelids flutter, but close just as quickly. She rolls in turn, puts her back to him. Leo almost makes the mistake of assuming that she's well and truly asleep, but she scoots back just enough to touch her body to his. Enough contact that she can sleep, but enough to leave it up to him if there's going to be more.

There's more. He presses himself to her, spoons against her. He's hardly cooled off and his overheated sweat-slicked skin can't feel nice. But her frame relaxes just a bit. Her body slowly goes fully limp, and she falls asleep against him in the cold air with only her feet under the blanket. It takes a little maneuvering but he gets the blanket up around the two of them. It's too hot. He hasn't cooled down enough and Renee is a furnace, not to mention the blanket trapping it in. But, he doesn't want to... he can bear it.

This- this has to fucking _stop_. Because they've been doing this for years. It never should have started in the first place, but it did, and now it's gone on for far too long. This has to stop because as of the late, he doesn't want her to go home at night after he's fucked her. He doesn't want her to- he wants to be assured that it's only him that she's seeing, that he's the only one rolling around in her sheets. He wants to see her places that aren't their homes, like at a nice restaurant, a theater.

Whatever they're doing has to stop, because it didn't have a name when they started and he's terrified to put a name to what he feels for her now.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I'm really fucking drunk as of writing this and I'm sorry.
> 
> However! I love me some emotional turmoil, so, like. This fic happened. I love it when people can't admit they're ~in love~.
> 
> As always, I love hearing from you guys. Feel free to comment or hit me with that sweet, sweet Kudos button.
> 
> I have [my blog](http://iwillpooponthefloor.tumblr.com) on tumblr, if you'd like to check that out, though it's mostly unrelated content. I'm not active much on there, but I'll try to get back to you if you'd rather contact me there.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
